World Food Bank issues emergency appeal to feed Oklahoma City Thunder

The World Food Bank last night called for urgent action to deliver food assistance to the Oklahoma City Thunder, amidst a Summer League background of gaunt, skeletal figures in blue uniforms. A spokesman from the organisation explained the situation. “It's obvious that there is an imbalance of resources in this habitat, where the scrawny specimens simply cannot compete with the larger players for food. At feeding time Holmgren is repeatedly out-muscled by Dort”. She rejected the notion that this was a new phenomenon, adding that "Pokusevski’s erratic behaviour on the court is clearly a symptom of confusion brought on by a shocking nutritional deficit.” At the time of press, the Memphis Grizzlies had quietly reached out to the Thunder to discuss how to divert calories towards their skinny centrepiece and away from Kenneth Lofton Jr.